Hieromartyr Varlaam of Perm (+1942)
Let us suppose that your life is
going more or less properly, that you have no great sins, and that for the
small ones you bring repentance. Do not even think of ascribing your good order
to yourself, to your own effort, attentiveness, or zeal—you are deeply
mistaken: before all our efforts goes grace, and without it we are nothing but
weakness, nothing but a festering abscess. Therefore, do not be proud of
another’s gift, since good order is from God; rather, fear lest you offend God
by self-esteem and pride, and receive condemnation like the Pharisee.
You, who are orderly, are
sometimes disturbed by the faults of those around you, by their disorderliness,
self-love, and inattentiveness toward you, especially if they are your
relatives; and you become grieved at them, condemn them in your soul, and perhaps
even openly hurl arrows, reproaches, and irritation. But stop, and know
yourself: why do you condemn your neighbor for a fault? Perhaps he has not been
given the corresponding talent, and so he sins; whereas it has been given to
you—but it is not you, but the grace of God, that upholds you. And for what
purpose? Is it really so that you may engage in the forbidden condemnation of
your neighbor and exalt yourself above him? You are mistaken: every gift is
given for the benefit and service of one’s neighbors. By reproach we destroy
our neighbor, increasing his wounds and the infirmities of his soul. In such a
state, your orderliness is occupied with the destruction of your neighbor. Be
horrified at yourself and remember the words of the Apostle: We who are strong
ought to bear the infirmities of the weak, and not to please ourselves (Rom.
15:1), but our neighbor, for his salvation (Rom. 15:2).
In self-justification, you may
perhaps say: “I do not condemn my neighbor, but when I see that people, even
those close to me, treat me unjustly, I leave them in peace and, as far as
possible, try to keep away from them.” But tell me: for what was the gift of
good order given to you? Was it so that you might complacently admire it and
become vainglorious, while despising your neighbor? Then you have neither love
for your neighbor nor concern for his salvation; you are occupied with
self-admiration. You are an idol to yourself, demanding worship and respect
from others. It is not in vain that it is said: he who does not love his
neighbor does not love God either; he loves only himself and is a self-idol,
abiding in virtuous self-delusion, while in essence remaining far from God and
from love for Him.
If you are a father or mother,
perhaps in justification of your strictness and exactingness toward your
children, you will say: “It is written, Honor thy father and mother, that it
may be well with thee” (Deut. 5:16). Yes, but this was said to children; to you
something else was said, namely: Fathers, provoke not your children to wrath
(Eph. 6:4). And will your proud reproaches and condemnation of their faults
awaken love for you in them? By no means. Love is born only through love and
condescension, through forgetfulness of one’s “I,” through the crucifixion of
one’s self-love for the sake of love for one’s neighbors and care for them.
Therefore, examine yourself: are
you serving God with your talent, or have you buried it in the earth of
self-love and negligence? If so, fear the lot of the slothful servant.
You will ask: “How am I to serve?
Must I really indulge the sinner and make peace with these sores?” Yes, make
peace with them; you are not higher than God, and He makes peace with them and
even bestows prosperity upon the wicked, waiting thereby to call them to
repentance. And who are you? A proud man and a lover of self. For if grace is
taken away, you too will prove to be an abyss of vice. It is not in vain that
the Holy Church shows this to everyone at Communion in the words: “Of whom I am
first” — that is, of sinners. Therefore, use your talent of an orderly life for
the knowledge of your own sores and those of your neighbors—not for
condemnation, but for healing, as a physician. And if you do not do this, then
know: you are already condemned, despite all your orderliness, as a wicked
servant who used the gift for evil toward his neighbor, thereby offending the
One Who gave it.
Therefore, having the gift of
good order, labor without sloth unto the glory of God, and for this purpose:
a) Do not be grieved at anyone:
this is the voice of sinful self-love, hateful to God.
b) Do not be surprised when you
encounter malice and injustice toward yourself. Remember: you are a physician,
and those around you are sick; you are called to heal their souls and morals by
sympathy, prayer, and the like, and not to seek love in return.
c) And if there is love in
return, do not take consolation in it, lest you lose heavenly love and forget
your calling.
d) Forget even yourself and your
own happiness, as the Lord commanded, but seek the good and benefit of others
in the name of God, and you will be warmed, as by a heavenly sun, by Divine
love.
e) Watch not how others treat
you, but how much you have succeeded in moving your neighbors toward good, in
diminishing their malice and guile, and in warming their cold hearts with
Christian sympathy.
f) When you see fruit, again do
not exalt yourself, lest you ascribe God’s work to yourself and become clouded
in mind to please the demon.
g) Blessed will you be if you
love God with all your soul and your neighbor as yourself, while denying your
very self; then with joy you will give yourself over to every labor and
deprivation, consumed by holy love for people as children of God, in faith that
by this you are serving God Himself, according to His unfailing word, and He
Himself will love you and make His abode with you.
Russian source:
Господь не осудит смиренного: наставления преосвященного
старца / архиеп. Варлаам (Ряшенцев), Samara Printing House, Samara, 2008.
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